Saturday, February 20, 2010

Alone to Be

There was this grim silence once again. The music was going on, as usual, but still that time marked an unfortunate event. “Hey dude… Come on one more peg!! You can do it! Come on T-Man!”
It was a deafening silence. The walls around were so far apart, yet the feeling of Claustrophobia crept in like the venom of a freshly bit Snake Wound, right up to the Skull. Smiles were all around, and people were rejoicing. Yet, something was missing, something deep inside, something which cannot be fathomed. Ok clear it. Put it aside. There are people who do not attain happiness even close to what you are getting right now. Feel lucky. Have a peg.
Drinking was never the forte. It never took away pain or grief like everyone said so. It just made the brain work less and it made the grief shoot up now and then spontaneously like horror movies which give Heart Attacks. Closing the eyes does not help too. It makes everything go round and round, like a merry-go-round. The thought of messing up the self-image by behaving out of place keeps the freedom inside a hard shelled cocoon, never letting it out. Drinking has been happier, when there are times which cannot be forgotten. With special people, when one knows that no matter how stupefying the behavior turns out to be, everything is taken in as a part of the game. Love that stuff. But with brethren, it’s all about keeping that Leo Pride intact, that kingly presence. Bullshit.
Sometimes life fosters questions, why and why again. Treading on the career path, getting things which are socially optimum, and winning the smiles and applauds of so many people you don’t even care about. How about doing something you would want to do? How about trying to be someone you wanted to be? No. It’s always about society, isn’t it? Getting good marks, having that productive life ahead; But what about something which the heart seeks, something which can stop this whole rat-race nonsense. Why go abroad when there is a strong reason to stay back? Why become a dog?
If life spells happiness in these things, then it is a sorry state of affairs, and deserves condemning. Success is nothing unless there is sharing and caring. Unless there are opportunities where one can just do weird stuff to make him smile and make the people around him smile along. And rightly said so, behind every successful man, there is an entity. This entity completes the circle of life. It creates joy, and abolishes grief. That is what people run after day after day, like a butterfly catcher. Never there. Never with. Never together.
Leos are weak. Whoever said that they are kings of the jungle. Below that crown lies a hollow skull, full of insecurity and woe. Damn those Astrological gurus. In the end, the tail is all that is left. A monkey is what stares from the mirror. Inside a cage, the monkey needs to be let loose. To hell with the lion, jumping from tree to tree is much more fun. If only there was a deal with the devil. But they say, waiting can beckon happiness. Alone to be, patiently. Like a Stone.